Riddles and jokes based on the nonsense pun.
Waiter, what soup is this?
It´s bean soup, sir.
I don´t care what it was. I want to know what it is now.
Waiter, what´s wrong with these eggs?
I don´t know, sir. I only laid the
table.
Waiter, will the pancakes be long?
No, sir, round.
Waiter, what´s this fly doing in my soup?
The breaststroke, I think, sir.
Doctor, will you help me out?
Certainly, which way did you come in?
Teacher: I wish you´d pay a little attention.
Pupil: I´m paying as little as I
can.
Waht do you call an Arabian dairy farmer?
A milk sheik.
What sort of robbery is the easiest?
A safe robbery.
What´s the best system of book-keeping?
Never lend them.
Which is the fastest, heat or cold?
Heat, because you can catch cold.
A barrel of beer fell on a man. Why wasn´t he hurt?
It was light ale.
What did the barman say when the ghost asked for a drink?
Sorry, we don´t serve spirits.
Why are policemen strong?
Because they can hold up traffic.
Which driver never commits a traffic offence?
A screwdriver.
What do
you call a bull asleep on the ground?
A bulldozer.